Today I got another tattoo. Yes, yes very shocking. I learned a lot from the experience though, so that as well as my resolutions I’m going to delve into now.
First off the tattoo I got today was not new. After I got my fyf tattoo on my right foot I soon got a musicheart tattoo on my left. It was only an outline though because I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with it, as a whole. After my left foot I started working on my back. I knew that one day I’d get my left foot filled in when I figured out my life. I originally envisioned that I was going to get it done on November 21st because that was an auspicious day for me. I instead decided to get it done today, four days before I turn 26 so I can sort of “book-end” my tattoo career. As it stands I have no future plans for anymore tattoos and I see filling in my musicheart as my final tattoo.
I originally wanted it done in purple, another auspicious colour but Vega wanted it in black because he has made a career out of black ink-work and it will just look better. It took me a few minutes but I agreed to it. Now that I look at it I agree black was a good way to go.
But yes, this was just a lengthy way of explaining that today I fulfilled my resolution to complete my tattoos. I have similarly met my resolutions of: agency and assertiveness by taking a course, self-defence by taking a class and finished the process of being well read by purchasing most of the books I want to read. Given I still have to read them all but that is a work in progress. As is piano, guitar and Japanese because these are all habits I have to form and they take more practice.
The second to last resolution I made was simply called “public image.” I think I go about achieving this resolution through conscious effort of being aware of what I say on youtube (and the internet) and being aware of how I look. I consider each purchase I make toward clothing a concerted effort to express a more defined public image. I can now live and represent the image I want to portray and live with purpose. Currently I am enamoured with visual kei.
The last resolution…is as undefined as the last few that I mentioned. It is the nicely vague resolution of “start career”. I am not sure how to go about this one. It is true I have graduated post secondary and am free to do whatever it is I wish with my life. It felt like I at last jumped through every hoop I was meant to in order to receive the freedom to decide what I want to do. However figuring out what to do with my days besides doing the only thing I tend to be interested in (watching videos, listening to music and sleeping) is proving to be difficult. I have involved myself with a few organizations that I always wanted to be a part of but I’m not sure that is enough. None of these organizations pay at the moment, but they fulfill my need to be helpful and needed. After all that’s the role I have crafted in this world: Helper. I am a helper. But helpers need to eat, be clothed and live in a house that is furnished and warmed. Does this beginning fulfill my resolution of “start career”? Some things I am still trying to figure out it would seem.